"at night, i open the window and ask the moon to come and press its face against mine. breathe into me. close the language-door and open the love-window. the moon won't use the door, only the window." -rumi
"DEATH IS THE VEIL WHICH THOSE WHO LIVE CALL LIFE; THEY SLEEP, AND IT IS LIFTED." -SHELLEY
"i have begun to listen to the teachings my blood whispers to me." -hesse

Thursday, January 15, 2009

this reality is hard on dreamers.

what had been so clear at the time of my soul retrieval is now clouded with self-doubt. am i a healer? am i meant to be a witch-doctor in training? why am i not having dreams? why can i not give up my vices? why when i decide to give up my vices do things suddenly turn to almost complete shit? why does this drive me to drink? why do i want to be numb?

the world is crumbling around me and to find beauty in this seems impossible.

how many times do i have to experience the beauty in pain before i get a reprieve from the torture and the chaos.

i am so tired. he is so tired. the world beats our backs and we are on our knees, begging for relief.

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